Thursday, September 6, 2012

We're Not Mixed, So Stop Asking!

I've heard this all of my life. People always asked if I was mixed because my hair was way long... without effort. This is way before the natural hair movement, when I was perming, starting at age fifteen. It wasn't very often, but I wasn't always taking care of my hair in the best way because I didn't know how then. I used to think that I was pretty special... until I became grown and got married. Then I just got plain annoyed. -____-
I don't even look mixed at all. I do, however, look like I can pass for being Indian because of my head shape, but I'm not. My mom is black, my dad is black, my grandparents on both sides are all black. Even their parents are black. Now that I married a silky haired, curly haired, black man who could honestly pass for Arabic, I definitely get asked that question... about our kids. He's black, his parents are black, and I think his grandparents are as well. Not totally sure. But now we have three kids, and everybody and their mama definitely think that we're mixed. Because me and hubby both have the so-called 'good hair', our kids appear mixed to everyone. Not exactly a bad thing; I'm just tired of having to explain myself. I get tired of answering that question. I never ask anyone that question because I think it's totally rude. What the hell does it matter if you're mixed? Your hair is still beautiful whether you are or not.
It's just plain ignorance. Just because your hair is long or a certain texture does not mean that you're mixed with something. I've seen people who are straight black with gorgeous hair. Of course, it is pretty baffling when you see it because not many people are used to seeing it. I had to get over that myself when I was younger. Every time I saw someone with silky hair, I'd automatically think that they were mixed with something. I was ignorant as well. But there comes a point where you grow up about these racial differences. People think it's so cool to be mixed because of hair properties, and we as black people are just now realizing that you don't have to be mixed to have long, beautiful hair. All you have to do is begin to educate yourself on how to take care of the hair you have, and it'll grow. You'll have everyone thinking you're mixed if you do it right. LOL!
It doesn't cost an arm, a leg, and your head on a platter, either. If you just use EVOO, water, and unrefined shea butter only, you'll already see a difference. I know I did. That's what I started out with. I've been studying natural hair for about a year and a half now, and I've learned a lot and have seen all different types of hair textures on all kinds of people. There are white people who have hair that is somewhat curly and kinky like a black person's. It's going to happen, and it's still really pretty hair that CAN be managed IF you study it and use the right things in it. Some people wish that they had curls. Everyone is mixed somewhere down the line anyway, whether it's in their immediate family or five generations ago.
So my point is that people need to get over this ridiculous stereotype about long hair and mixed people. To me, it's kind of annoying now. I understand if you're a kid, or even a teenager. But if you're way grown, it's time to stop the stereotyping because all you're doing is offending someone. I've had people swear up and down that I was mixed. My sister had even longer hair than I did when she was young. She had silky,wavy hair that went down to her waist at four years old! It just happens.
Grow up, people; let's not remain ignorant.
Next time someone asks me this question, I'm going to work up the courage to sarcastically say, "Yeah, we're mixed. Mixed with African and American!" ^__^

~Epic Realist~